When the weapons were still made of stone,
so many thousand years ago,
the prehistoric man was alone but still wanted to mate.
No amount of whining and howling helped, so he went to the weapon cabinet, took out the soft club, and went searching for a mate.
Shy ones gathered in hordes, driven only by wild lust, not wanting to murder females, just quickly satisfy their desires.
Some dragged their busty conquests back to the cave with grunts, but then the peace was gone.
In the morning they started quarreling and after one, two, three, four years he wanted to drag them back but the children were firmly on the side of their mother.
Who would sing them to sleep? And who would cook their food? Who would play and jump with them?
Cave Adam was distraught, gave in to his despair and ignored their quarreling in his cave chamber because he had a dream and expanded the cave, creating a separate workspace, a safe space for the woman's nagging - a no-go area for the little one.
Everything stayed the same here; his life's work emerged and his mind could flourish.
Clubs remained in the closet and when lust struck him, he never went public and never exposed himself.
Instead, he shared his knowledge with the world on clay tablets, always polite and well-mannered, never touching a woman inappropriately as he always courted them.
Only a few times a year when the stars shine bright does he think about how it used to be and suffers hellish torment.
